Top Tip’s Tuesday: Picking Your Chief Bridesmaid…
As women we are faced with more than many tough decisions in life. What career do you want? What colour scheme is your wardrobe going to take in 2017? What to take up as a hobby? Or, will that fringe that you have always dreamt about suit you? OK, some may be more important than others but you get the point. One tricky decision some of us will have to make is – “Who do I choose as my chief bridesmaid?”
Some may have this so, so easy – you may have even planned it all out before your partner popped the question. Shh… don’t tell them that though! Now this may seem like a simple question and I know what you’re thinking, “My best friend of course”, but this has to be a thought out decision, and of course, there are other options too.
So, to ensure that you have the best hen party and most importantly, pillar of support (aka maid of honour) here are The Wedding Affair‘s top tips for picking the best girl to be your chief bridesmaid.
What Are Their Strengths & Weaknesses?
As the bride, give yourself the task of being critical. It may not be the best role, but it will honestly help you on your task to find your prefect maid of honour. It is an important, yet often overlooked step in the process: just because your friend ‘X’ is a great laugh, doesn’t mean she’s a great hen do planner. Similarly, ‘Y’ might be organised and a perfectionist, but she might not be able to let her hair down during the party. So, take your time and think about who’ll be best for the job. Because, you want a chief bridesmaid who is supportive, fun, trustworthy and of course, super duper organised!
Make sure they actually want to be a chief bridesmaid…
This may seem really obvious, but, just because they’re your best friend that doesn’t automatically mean that they want to be your chief bridesmaid. So make sure you actually ask them if they’d like the honour and not just assume. That way you’ll avoid that potential awkward disappointment, just in case she declines (yes this does happen!).
Don’t feel disheartened if this does happen, it could just be down to the fact your best friend has too many work, or personal commitments to be the chief bridesmaid!
Make it clear what is required of them
You know this makes sense, especially if the friend in question has never been a maid of honour before. Give her an idea of what you’d like her to get involved with. If you’d like her to be really involved – let her know, if you only want her to help out with little things – let her know, one again. Obviously, she’s going to have to organise a hen party for you, but aside from that what would you like her to do?
The best interests at heart?
It’s your wedding not hers. This may seem obvious to start with but believe us; once the two of you start sampling cake and trying on gorgeous gowns, some chief bridesmaids may even forget it’s not their wedding… obviously this could result in a whole load of problems! Some even start enforcing their opinions and preferences onto you (whilst completely disregarding yours.) So, do make sure you stand your ground and if she starts acting like a Bridezilla , remind her whose big day it really is.
Last but not least…
If you follow these steps and use your own intuition then we’re sure you’ll make the right decision. However, if it does end up going wrong and you do want strangle your chief bridesmaid. Then there’s really no harm in calmly telling her that (for the sake of your friendship) you don’t think she’s cut out for the job.
Remember, if you can’t choose between friends – there’s nothing stopping you from picking more than one, or just ditching the idea in general! There is always the option to choose family too? Get on like a house on fire with your sister? Or, perhaps you have always gotten on ever so well with your cousins? Do whatever you feel is right!
Pick the girls, or boys that you feel will support you the most, the ones that will make you laugh when the budgets become too much, and the ones that will stick by you no matter what – just remember to have fun!
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